Today I got an e-mail from someone named Tanya Hanna...basically a 4-page screed concerning a woman named Becky Pelfrey, who is apparently Tanya's ex-husband's wife.
Apparently Tanya (who I don't know from Adam) thinks I'm a friend of Becky (who I also don't know from Adam), and the purpose of the e-mail is to set me straight about this supposedly awful woman.
Naturally I headed to Google. I found out that both Tanya and Becky and apparently all parties concerned really do exist, and were involved in a mini-scandal that caught the attention of news media in the Mansfield, Texas area.
I won't bore you with the particulars, but it all happened in October 2005. That was two years ago!
Why is Tanya e-mailing me? Have any of you gotten this e-mail? I'm curious as to why I was on the recipient list, but I'm not about to e-mail Tanya and ask her. I'm not opening that Pandora's box, thank you very much. But I must admit I'm curious as to why I got the e-mail.
...and I do the Monday Madness meme...
1. Do you feel that children these days are disciplined enough?--Well...no. In fact, I'm appalled at what I see kids get away with.
2. What are your thoughts about the "time out chair?"--I don't think it's a bad idea, if it works for that particular child. I never used it when my kids were small.
3. When YOU were a child, what form of discipline did your parents use most often?--I was spanked! Sometimes with a belt! It was always brief, and always administered to the rear end. Never did it leave any permanent physical or emotional harm. I honestly didn't get as many spankings as my siblings, though, because I always tried really hard to be good. (Just ask my mom. :))
4. Did your parents have to constantly remind you of the guidelines they set for you, or did they just have to LOOK at you as a "gentle" reminder?--Again, this makes me sound ridiculously saintly. But my dad often said that he could accomplish more with a stern look my way than with a spanking.
5. What are your thoughts about screaming kids in public places?--I've got to admit, it's annoying. But I honestly try to put myself in the mom's shoes. We've all been in situations in public with a crying baby or toddler...often it's just a case of an infant being over-tired or hungry. But I've seen kids throwing outrageous tantrums, and there's just no excuse for that. In that case, I think I would drop everything and leave the public venue and go where I could discipline the child without onlookers.
6. What do you feel is the BIGGEST mistake parents make when it comes to disciplining children?--You know...I guess I would say just letting children have their way all the time. You're not doing your child any favors by giving in to them on everything. Basically, you'll be raising a spoiled brat who thinks the world owes them something. Let them find out what it's like not to get what they want all the time, even if it means having to discipline a tantrum. They'll grow up with much better character.
Hey, answer the Monday Madness questions on your own blog or here in my comments section!
4 comments:
That is weird about that e-mail! Either the sender holds a grudge a long time or it has taken a life of its own as spam now. I hadn't heard of this before.
I haven't gotten into the Monday Madness because I'm involved in some kind of weekly meme several other days a week, but I do agree with everything you said here! One of mine could be corrected with just a look or a word, but another one seemed to take a lot of effort to "get it." :-)
1. Do you feel that children these days are disciplined enough?
No. I think that many parents are more concerned about being a 'friend' than a parent.
2. What are your thoughts about the "time out chair?"
I think time out is a useful method of discipline depending upon the child. It can help calm a situation and let a child think through their actions.
3. When YOU were a child, what form of discipline did your parents use most often?
How should I remember? That was so many years ago. I would get an occasional smack. Sometimes it would be removal of privileges.
4. Did your parents have to constantly remind you of the guidelines they set for you, or did they just have to LOOK at you as a "gentle" reminder?
I needed reminding at times but certainly not constantly. I knew the standard.
5. What are your thoughts about screaming kids in public places?
A kid should only ever scream if there is something seriously wrong. Thankfully neither of our kids ever tried that one. I guess they knew they wouldn't get away with it.
6. What do you feel is the BIGGEST mistake parents make when it comes to disciplining children?
Lack of enforced boundaries. Parents threaten discipline but don't carry through. The child knows that mum and dad will fold before they do and there won't be any consequences to their action so there's not need to change. I think consistency is a huge issue. If a child is punished for a certain action one day and not the next they can be confused. They don't know what the standard should be.
That was a really odd e-mail you got!!!
Good Post!!
Rodney, I agree with you about consistency. That was something I struggled with when my children were small...I was more often the parent that would be tempted to "fold." My husband was great at enforcing boundaries!
My kids are all in their 20s now, and they're great young adults, so I guess all's well that ends well. :)
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